Avrupa’da ebeveynlik: Hayat zor ama daha anlamlı

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Having children is an experience that both fascinates people and presents them with different responsibilities. A recent study on parental life satisfaction confirms this conflicting situation: compared to childless individuals, parents find their lives more meaningful. However, this does not mean they are happier. On the contrary: parents’ satisfaction levels are often lower.

Socologists from the University of Cologne, Marita Jacob and Ansgar Hudde, published their findings in the academic journal Journal of Marriage and Family. The study used data from the European Social Survey, involving over 43,000 participants from 30 countries.

Jacob and Hudde found that, regardless of nationality and social status, both mothers and fathers feel a deeper sense of meaning in their lives.

However, when it comes to satisfaction, the picture is different. The concept of satisfaction is not only closely tied to an individual’s living conditions but is also shaped by the country’s family policies and gender factors. Mothers are less happy compared to fathers.

The positive impact of family policies in Scandinavia

“Parents in challenging life conditions are less satisfied,” says Marita Jacob, Professor of Sociology at the University of Cologne, and she continues: “By ‘challenging,’ we mean various life situations such as single parenthood, having children at a young age, or low educational levels.”

However, according to Jacob, this is not an unchangeable law of nature: “In Scandinavian countries, there is not much difference among social groups. Moreover, in these countries, the gap in life satisfaction between parents and childless individuals is much smaller compared to Central and Eastern European countries.”

Family policies in Scandinavian countries contribute to increased parental satisfaction. Photo: Emilie Holtet/NTR/AP/picture alliance

According to Jacob, social family policies such as childcare, parental assistance, and parental leave work very well in Scandinavian countries: “I guess these measures affect the entire society. That is, children are not just a parent’s problem but a collective responsibility borne by society as a whole.”

Jacob says this approach is also reflected in Scandinavian employers. In these countries, it is more common for parents to start work earlier and leave earlier, and important meetings are scheduled according to family routines.

Gender equality increases happiness

In Europe, the burden of family life still mostly falls on women. In Germany, one in two women reduces their working hours to take care of their children. Interestingly, only 6% of part-time working German men do this for “family reasons.” Many of the parental leaves taken after childbirth are also used by mothers again in Germany.

According to sociology Professor Marita Jacob, another reason why parents in Finland are happier than those in Germany is gender equality: “Less gender pay gap in Scandinavian countries makes women happier. This situation also positively affects couples’ bonds and, consequently, the family.”

“Children are a shared responsibility of society”

Jacob, sharing her own experience, explains that all parents in daycare support each other when their children are young: “Everyone would pick up not only their own child but also their friends’ children from the nursery. Those with small children know: A half-hour difference can determine whether the day ends with a crisis or peace. Therefore, parents’ offers of support should not just be words but truly put into action.”

However, Professor Jacob believes that the primary responsibility still lies with the government: “The lack of proper daycare or children suffering at school should not be solely the parents’ problem. Children are a shared responsibility of society as a whole.”

The sociologist emphasizes that children should not only be seen as “a tool to keep the population young in aging societies”: “Children have a unique value. They bring vitality, new ideas, and innovations to society and families.”